Roast jokes dating the boss

05-Dec-2016 19:56

The moral of the story: After the second surgery, the Arab sent the Scotsman a thank-you card and a box of Quality Street chocolates.

The Scotsman was shocked that the Arab did not reciprocate his kind gesture as he had anticipated.

The cockroach got up and walked, so they they learned that a cockroach could walk with just three legs. He can’t build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. I've heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger. The son replies he is scared because he dreamt that Auntie Susie had died.

(The officer gives man the ticket.) Man: Would I get another ticket if I called you a jerk? For the first experiment, they cut one of the cockroach's legs off, then they told the cockroach to walk. And I’m married to a hot 23-year-old who not only gives me the greatest sex ever, but cooks like a master chef, and keeps my house spotless! I’ll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don’t you give me a hard time about it. “I know we’ve been married for twenty years, but I want a divorce” The wife says nothing, keeps looking at the road ahead but slowly increases her speed to 45 mph. “I don’t want you to try and talk me out of it,” he says, “because I’ve been having an affair with your best friend, and she’s a far better lover than you are.” Again the wife stays quiet, but grips the steering wheel more tightly and slowly increases the speed to 55. A stranger was seated next to a blonde on the airplane when the stranger turned to her and said, 'Let's talk. His son is having a nightmare - the man wakes him and asks his son if he is OK?

At the end of the day: the car isnt washed, the bills arent paid, there is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter, the flowers dont have enough water, there is still only one cheque in my cheque book, I cant find the remote, I cant find my glasses, and I dont remember what I did with the car keys.He then phoned the Arab and asked him: "I thought you would be more generous than that - last time you sent me a BMW, diamonds and money, but this time you only sent me a lousy thank-you card and a crappy box of chocolates ?" "I go in at well past 9 oclock in the evening, eat several courses slowly, linger over coffee, port and a cigar.If you want the relationship to move forward, find deeper areas where you can reach him and inspire him.But let’s take a completely different side of this…

At the end of the day: the car isnt washed, the bills arent paid, there is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter, the flowers dont have enough water, there is still only one cheque in my cheque book, I cant find the remote, I cant find my glasses, and I dont remember what I did with the car keys.

He then phoned the Arab and asked him: "I thought you would be more generous than that - last time you sent me a BMW, diamonds and money, but this time you only sent me a lousy thank-you card and a crappy box of chocolates ?

" "I go in at well past 9 oclock in the evening, eat several courses slowly, linger over coffee, port and a cigar.

If you want the relationship to move forward, find deeper areas where you can reach him and inspire him.

But let’s take a completely different side of this…

You say that you give him everything he needs sexually, emotionally, physically and mentally. you’re basically saying that you’re his perfect dream girl.